The most dangerous lie you ever tell won’t be to your best friend; it won’t be to your boss; it won’t even be to your spouse.
The most dangerous lie you ever tell will be the one you to tell to yourself. It’s the lie you tell in private right before the ones you tell to everyone around you.
You tell yourself things like:
– “They don’t need to know the details because there is no way they will ever find out.“
– “I don’t need to tell anyone the specifics of what is going on because it’s only going to make things worse. “
– “What I’ve done really isn’t wrong because ______________.”
– “There’s no need to embarrass myself because this is going to be the last time I ever _____________ and after that I’m going to get past this on my own.”
– “I can just carry this secret to my grave and no one will ever have to know.”You realize that there is the risk of hurting the people around you that you care about if the truth comes out. And that scares you because you genuinely don’t want to hurt anyone.
But what you don’t realize is that the reason you are lying to them is because you are first lying to yourself. Every lie you tell to other people first begins with a lie to yourself.
The most dangerous lie you ever tell is the one where you convince yourself that lying is the best way to protect you and the best way to protect others. And unfortunately that is the lie you’ve told yourself so many times that you’ve actually convinced yourself that it’s true.
So while it is painful that you would lie to the people closest to you in your life, it’s tragic that you can’t be honest with yourself.
The truth is we are all broken. The truth is we all need help. The truth is that we all make mistakes. And the truth usually is that we are truly sorry. The truth is that life is always ultimately better when we live in truth because honesty – while painful – is the shortest way to a life of restored peace.
So start being honest with yourself and you’ll find that you naturally want to be more honest with others.
Oh and by the way, that other thing you tell yourself…. the one that says: “If I tell the truth I’ll be judged, I’ll be ruined and I’ll never be forgiven…”
That’s a lie too.
The truth is that when you tell the truth you’ll be surprised at how many of us around you have also needed grace at some point in our lives – so welcome to the club.